Edwards indicted: Couldn’t happen to a more deserving slimeball

Pardon me while I laugh with glee and do a jig:

Former presidential candidate John Edwards was indicted Friday on criminal charges by a federal grand jury in Raleigh, N.C, for misusing campaign funds to cover up an affair.

Edwards faces six counts — four of illegal campaign contributions, one of conspiracy and one of false statements.

Edwards, a Democrat who served one term in the Senate representing North Carolina and who was Sen. John Kerry’s (D-Mass.) vice presidential running mate in 2004, fell from grace over the last three years after admitting an affair with Rielle Hunter and then that he had fathered a child with his former staffer, all while his wife Elizabeth Edwards battled cancer.

Earlier Friday, there were reports that talks toward a plea deal between Edwards’s lawyers and the Justice Department had collapsed.

I have despised John Edwards with a visceral passion ever since he came on the national scene in 2004. Everything about him screamed “hypocrite,” “phony,” and “fraud.” He was an unctuous snake-oil salesman who personified all the worst, most cynical aspects of our politics and legal system. (Hey, he was a plaintiff’s trial lawyer who made his money off exploiting medical malpractice suits. What did we expect?) He’s the living embodiment of Elmer Gantry, a con artist who’d take your trust, your money, and your vote, pat you on the back, and laugh inside at what a fool he’s made of you. In all the years since, I have never understood how anyone could fall for his act.

Really, I have to ask of any (hopefully former) Edwards supporters in the audience: How could you be so dumb?

And to think, but for a few thousand votes in Ohio, this sanctimonious charlatan almost became vice-president, one gunshot or heart attack from the Oval Office, itself.

My friends we truly dodged a nightmare in 2004, and I don’t just mean having Lurch for president.

But once again we see how hubris is brought down by nemesis; in this case, John Edwards was the instrument of his own destruction.

It’s a reminder that there is Justice in the world, and yes, I take great pleasure in this moment.

Enjoy your stay at Club Fed, John!

RELATED: Previous posts on John Edwards.

(Crossposted at Sister Toldjah)

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One Response to Edwards indicted: Couldn’t happen to a more deserving slimeball

  1. MadAlfred says:

    I’m sorry, but Lurch was a font of intellectual conversation compared to Sen. John Kerry (D-Idiot)

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