School confiscates cupcakes decorated with plastic “Army men”

"Quick, children! Cover your eyes!"

“Quick, children! Cover your eyes!”

Because, you know, someone might be scarred for life at the sight of a tiny plastic rifle.

Or, even worse, they might want to –*gulp!*– “play Army.”

Thank God our courageous educators were there to prevent a crisis:

A Michigan elementary school is defending its decision to confiscate a third-graders batch of homemade cupcakes because the birthday treats were decorated with plastic green Army soldiers.

Casey Fountain told Fox News that the principal of his son’s elementary school called the cupcakes “insensitive” — in light of the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut.

“It disgusted me,” he said. “It’s vile they lump true American heroes with psychopathic killers.”

Fountain’s wife made a batch of 30 chocolate cupcakes for their son Hunter’s classmates at Schall Elementary School in the town of Caro. The 9-year-old helped decorate the treats with plastic figurines representing World War Two soldiers.

The following morning Fountain said his wife delivered the cupcakes to the front office. The secretary complimented her on the decorations and then took the cakes to Hunter’s class.

“About 15 minutes later the school called my wife and told her the couldn’t serve the cupcakes because the soldiers had guns,” Fountain told Fox News. “My wife told them to remove the soldiers and serve the cupcakes anyway — and I believe she may have used more colorful language.”

The school complied and confiscated the soldiers — sending them home with Hunter in a bag.

Because representations of American soldiers, who’ve been fighting and dying for human liberty since 1775, and especially little figurines of U.S. WWII soldiers, who only liberated half the danged planet, are no different than gunmen who shoot up schools and movie theaters; they’re just too horrifying to behold.

If you’re a Michigan school official.

I swear I’m getting more and more sympathetic toward home-schooling with each passing day.

(Crossposted at Sister Toldjah)

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2 Responses to School confiscates cupcakes decorated with plastic “Army men”

  1. Lance Thompson says:

    Great post. The photo at the top is of Marx WW II figures. Marx made the best military play sets in the 60′s, and their figures were top quality. I can’t imagine any cupcake who wouldn’t be happy to be topped by one of these manly figures.

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