Barack Obama: president and advice columnist

On top of the already awesome responsibilities weighing down on his shoulders (such as filling out his NCAA brackets), our President-Messiah has started writing an advice column. Today’s topic is Special Olympics, something the Light Worker is an expert at: Let’s Hear It For the Tards

Dear Jean and Ted:

As you know I am a big fan of the Special Olympics program, and all the good things it does for young Mongoloid-Americans like your son. Nothing inspires more than the sight of these heroic young tards hilariously giving it their all in the arena of friendly athletic competition. Extra-chromosome? More like extra-awesome! That’s why I recently volunteered, on the advice of my damage control team, as an equipment manager for the U.S. Special Olympics bowling squad. At first I wasn’t sure how I would feel about polishing other people’s balls for a change, but I think those tards really appreciate what I’ve done for them. Lately they started calling me "Special O."

Take that, Sarah Palin. And move over, James Thurber. Iowahawk just stole your lunch money. Rolling on the floor

(hat tip: Melissa Clouthier)


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