Edwards indicted: Couldn’t happen to a more deserving slimeball

June 3, 2011

Pardon me while I laugh with glee and do a jig:

Former presidential candidate John Edwards was indicted Friday on criminal charges by a federal grand jury in Raleigh, N.C, for misusing campaign funds to cover up an affair.

Edwards faces six counts — four of illegal campaign contributions, one of conspiracy and one of false statements.

Edwards, a Democrat who served one term in the Senate representing North Carolina and who was Sen. John Kerry’s (D-Mass.) vice presidential running mate in 2004, fell from grace over the last three years after admitting an affair with Rielle Hunter and then that he had fathered a child with his former staffer, all while his wife Elizabeth Edwards battled cancer.

Earlier Friday, there were reports that talks toward a plea deal between Edwards’s lawyers and the Justice Department had collapsed.

I have despised John Edwards with a visceral passion ever since he came on the national scene in 2004. Everything about him screamed “hypocrite,” “phony,” and “fraud.” He was an unctuous snake-oil salesman who personified all the worst, most cynical aspects of our politics and legal system. (Hey, he was a plaintiff’s trial lawyer who made his money off exploiting medical malpractice suits. What did we expect?) He’s the living embodiment of Elmer Gantry, a con artist who’d take your trust, your money, and your vote, pat you on the back, and laugh inside at what a fool he’s made of you. In all the years since, I have never understood how anyone could fall for his act.

Really, I have to ask of any (hopefully former) Edwards supporters in the audience: How could you be so dumb?

And to think, but for a few thousand votes in Ohio, this sanctimonious charlatan almost became vice-president, one gunshot or heart attack from the Oval Office, itself.

My friends we truly dodged a nightmare in 2004, and I don’t just mean having Lurch for president.

But once again we see how hubris is brought down by nemesis; in this case, John Edwards was the instrument of his own destruction.

It’s a reminder that there is Justice in the world, and yes, I take great pleasure in this moment.

Enjoy your stay at Club Fed, John!

RELATED: Previous posts on John Edwards.

(Crossposted at Sister Toldjah)


John Edwards embarrasses even sleaze-bags

January 26, 2010

Sure, he’ll admit admit little Frances Quinn is his child by Rielle Hunter… after a year of lying about it. But pay for his toddler’s dental work?

Forget it.

And this walking, talking pustule came close to being vice-president and had a reasonable chance at the Democratic nomination for president? Excuse me while I go find the nearest church and light several candles in thanks for us not being stuck with the living incarnation of Elmer Gantry.

(Via Ace. Sure, it’s the Enquirer. But, remember, they were right all along about the affair and illegitimate child.)


Worst candidate ever? Check.

January 15, 2010

Really, I thought the Democrats had hit bottom with John Kerry in 2004, but that was until I’d discovered Martha Coakley, heir to Democratic nominee for Ted Kennedy’s throne the US Senate from Massachusetts. Let’s review, shall we?

  • Act as if the seat is already yours? Check.
  • Claim that the terrorists have all left Afghanistan days after a terrorist kills several CIA agents… in Afghanistan? Check.
  • Refuse to meet the voters and insult a beloved state landmark? Check.
  • Tell Catholics they shouldn’t work in emergency rooms because of their religion? In a heavily Catholic state? Check.

And, for the cherry on the sundae, trust your advertising to allies who think it’s a great idea to attack your opponent as a lackey of Wall Street in an ad using an image of the World Trade Center as the background.

I really thought Scott Brown had no chance, and Coakley may still win the election, but she may be accomplishing what was once thought to be impossible: handing a Senate seat –the one held by Ted Kennedy, no less– to a Republican in Deep Blue Massachusetts, which in turn would spell almost certain death for Kennedy’s beloved nationalized health care.

Is it possible she’s a deep-cover agent for Karl Rove? Or is she really this miserable a candidate?

ADDENDUM: Speaking of Kerry, the Democrats missed a chance in 2008 to surpass his ineptitude by failing to nominate his 2004 running-mate, John Edwards. I guarantee you, he would have been a total train wreck.

UPDATE: The hits keep coming: Rip off a corporate trademark and earn yourself a cease and desist letter? And you’re the state’s chief law-enforcement officer? Check.


Good advice

July 30, 2009

From Victor Davis Hanson, some words of wisdom for America’s elite hypocrites:

Do the wealthy and the powerful lecture us about our wrongs because they know their own insider status ensures that they are exempt from the harsh medicine they advocate for others? Millionaire Gore is not much affected by higher taxes for his cap-and-trade crusade.

Or does the hypocrisy grow out of a sort of class snobbery? Do elites hector the crass middle class because it lacks their own taste, rare insight, and privileged style? Judging from the police report, Gates seemed flabbergasted that the white Cambridge cop did not know who he was “messing” with.

Or is the new hypocrisy an eerie sort of psychological compensation at work? Perhaps the more Al Gore rails about carbon emissions, the more he can without guilt enjoy what emits them. The more Professor Gates can cite racism, the more he himself is paid to spot it. And the more a Tom Daschle wants to tax and spend for health care, the less badly he feels about his own chauffer and tax avoidance?

Here’s a little advice for all of America’s aristocratic critics: a little less hypocrisy, a little more appreciation of your good lives — and then maybe the rest of us will listen to you a little more.

Read the whole thing. Applause