At least they weren’t shot?

July 5, 2010

One does not disappoint Dear Leader:

North Korean team will be sent to coal mines as punishment, reports say

MORE than one disgraced national team has been heckled by angry fans on returning home – but North Korea’s misfiring stars reportedly face a much harsher punishment.

Unfortunately, crazed dictator Kim Jong-il chose the 7-0 mauling at the hands of Portugal to be the first football game ever broadcast in the impoverished communist nation.

“The Portuguese won the game and now have four points,” the Korean Central Broadcasting commentator said at the conclusion of the match. “We are ending our live broadcast now.” It then cut to factory workers and engineers praising the Dear Leader.

Seems the result may not have tallied too well with Kim Jong-il’s narrative that North Korea is a socialist paradise populated by athletic supermen.

Given the realities of life in North Korea, aka “The world’s biggest prison camp,” I’m not so sure being spared the firing squad was a boon.

The Queen of Hearts has nothing on the King of Heartless.

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